Ready
August 16, 2004 
1:16 am
I added my new progress chart. Now that I've established my weekly routine, I will be able to start updating it regularly again! I really, really want to be doing Curves five days a week. The wonderful results I got going only 3 days a week are an encouraging memory, and really at the moment I have nothing better to do!
I'm at work right now with Jay. I have a job that I want to apply for, and for some reason it's easier to do work here in his office than at my desk at home. Of course, I'm not writing the job application right now, am I? :) I need to tweak my resume a bit; the company is a medical one though it is asking for a freelance copy editor, so I'm going to chop out my library position on the resume and replace it with my Pharmacy Technician one.
I guess the most frustrating part about jobsearching for a proofreader/copyeditor position is that all of them want a Bachelor's degree in English. Why? None of my classes (and I was senior level) had anything to do with grammar. Grammar wasn't a requirement for an English degree; it was an elective. There were many, many graduates with BA's in English who never cracked a grammar book in their lives. A degree in the subject is not a guarantor of expertise, unfortunately. How to get that across to an employer, though? I can't, until I'm in the interview and being asked about my education. Then I can make my stand, but if I'm cut from the pool before I even get the chance to sink or swim... well. As I said, it's frustrating.
Ah, but what does that have to do with weightloss? :) Nothing, really. Just another one of my obstacles to overcome here in my new home.
I like my new Curves. Some of their measuring techniques are a little... odd (like measuring my "waist" at the band of my bra.. wtf?), but I'll deal with it. I couldn't quite convince Jay on Friday that I needed the WW scale, though, so I don't have it yet. I do still want one to have at home-- that way I can track my progress there, and not have to rely solely on the Curves scale (a scale like you see at the doc's, with the weight balancers... just as medieval and just as inaccurate).
That discussion with Jay was actually a source of some unhappiness this past weekend. I think I just have to have Jay start reading this diary, so that he can see. Yes, it is $50 and yes, it is "only" a scale. But it's also a measure of my effort and the work I'm putting into my body. He said he "didn't understand" why I needed it. There were so many ways to explain why... and accuracy was the only one I think I was able to get across to him well. Jay is athletic and lithe and doesn't really understand the motivation of watching the numbers sink. He doesn't understand that the need to know those numbers are accurate is a very great one indeed. How can you really be happy with a one-week 6lb loss when your scale never gives the same reading twice? How can you trust it?
I adjust my food intake and exercise by what I see happening on the scale. If I cut carbs and notice a difference, I'll continue with eating that lesser amount of carbs. But what if I cut carbs, it does make a difference, and my scale doesn't show it? I might miss a new edge that way. I just don't like that.
Finally I made it clear to him that the scale was to come out of my clothing/essentials budget, which he hadn't originally realized. Now he is okay with it, though I can tell he's still a little dubious about the whole situation. Not that I blame him; since we've been together I've only gained weight and not lost it. It's hard to see that and then acquiesce to something that might only be a rather expensive part of a pipe dream. But I have lost the weight, I have been successful, and I will be again.
Anyway, that's the scoop here. I'll be with Jay at work tonight until about 5am, which is his lunch break, and then I'll go home for a nap until he gets home at 9:00. Then it's up and off to Curves, home for a shower, and time to tackle the day's doings.
I am ready, for all of it.
